Saturday, March 20, 2010

When Should My Parents Meet Your Parents?

It's Only Dinner writes: I've been dating "Amanda" for eight months and everything is going great. I've met her parents, and she has met mine. Two days ago, I mentioned that we should plan a dinner with both sets of parents since they have not met yet. Amanda told me that our parents shouldn't meet until we move into together or are engaged. I felt offended. When do you think is the right time for our parents to meet? -- IT'S ONLY DINNER!

Dear Only Dinner,

It sounds to me like Amanda is looking for more of a commitment from you or at least trying to figure out where you stand. To be frank, I don't think the dinner with parents is the real issue here at all. Amanda seems to be ready to take your relationship to the next level and she is probing for information from you. If you can stomach it, I would approach this head-on by asking her directly if she wants to talk about your relationship and where it is going. It may be that she's afraid of what you will say and does not know how to approach the topic. Take some time to figure out your responses to this before beginning the conversation. Amanda feeling this way is not uncommon given the length of your dating period. However, entertaining the idea that I am completely off base here, to answer your question, I'm surprised your parents haven't already met. The fact that it was your idea to have the dinner should show Amanda that you are serious about her, your relationship, and the family that comes with it.


  1. I love these!!!! I love checking in and seeing what new advice is in!

  2. Great advice.

    I was around my husband's parents a lot before we were married.

  3. Thanks Jen, that means a lot to me. I've been a bit behind because of being out of the house. It's time to start back in.

    WhisperingWriter, I agree with you. I think that is the natural occurrence for most couples.